Tantangel Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 I found this rather humorous after reading it on a MySpace bulletin my brother had reposted. One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bl3h Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 What a legend! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killalou Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Roflmao!!!!!!! Owned! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aulian Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Hahaha, that dude owns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mudder Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Lol! Good stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wayward Knight Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Man, is he brave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dizz Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 I can tell you that she wins this and all rounds in the future. She holds the trump card for controlling what he wants. She can at least 'satisfy' her own shopping needs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pali Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 I can tell you that she wins this and all rounds in the future. She holds the trump card for controlling what he wants. She can at least 'satisfy' her own shopping needs. Masturbation's also an option for the guy. Sure, it's not as fun, but neither is paying for your crap instead of someone buying it for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest emp_newb Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Tant, your brother may have reposted it, but I posted it first And your on my myspace fool. www.myspace.com/soco_champ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tantangel Posted November 4, 2007 Author Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Yeah, but I didn't see it ever. I barely pay attention to my bulletin boards and I just happened to catch that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raargant Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 That joke's been around for years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'tarako Posted November 5, 2007 Report Share Posted November 5, 2007 That joke's been around for years. 'So has your mom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aulian Posted November 5, 2007 Report Share Posted November 5, 2007 I think he just burned Raar? Didnt he? I think he did Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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