Tantangel Posted July 13, 2008 Report Share Posted July 13, 2008 Any way to get out of this God forsaken zone of doom? I absolutely hate it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imoutgoodbye Posted July 13, 2008 Report Share Posted July 13, 2008 Any way to get out of this God forsaken zone of doom? I absolutely hate it. Yes and no. To move out of this zone, you risk becoming something she might hate. You either move out of this zone and into the one you want, or you screw yourself over and don't even have the friend zone as a consolation prize. Who would want the friend zone when they want more in the first place, I don't know. That would be sad. Make yourself aloof. Just stop caring about too much in general. Friends are in the friend zone because they're the "nice guy" that they can just dump on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mattamue Posted July 13, 2008 Report Share Posted July 13, 2008 Tell him you like his company and want to take it to the next level. :eek: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imoutgoodbye Posted July 13, 2008 Report Share Posted July 13, 2008 Tell him you like his company and want to take it to the next level. :eek: I had no idea he was like that! Dude, if Deykari's leavin' you hangin' like that, he's just playin' with your head! He's so free with all the other guys I've ever seen him with! You march right up to him and say, "You little ho-bag, I want COMMITMENT and I WANT IT NOW!" Then slap him across the face and make him call you daddy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dale Posted July 13, 2008 Report Share Posted July 13, 2008 Date one of her friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killalou Posted July 13, 2008 Report Share Posted July 13, 2008 Nothing you can do really. You can either go on a gamble and tell the person you want to be more than a friend to them and either get rejected and lose friend status, further your relationship with that person, or remain friends after rejection and have things become a bit akward. The best thing do IMHO is to find someone else and not make the same mistake you made with this person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deykari Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Prevention is better than cure, I'm afraid. The further you get into the friend zone, the harder it is to get out. From experience, not only in terms of how you might harm the friendship you have, but also in terms of making them view you as 'attractive' and not 'as a friend'. There are two ways to go about it assuming you are looking for a relationship with this person and not just sex - - Directly confront the person, and tell them exactly how you feel. This could go one of two ways depending on the person you're telling, and you could massively freak them out. I'm not saying it won't work, and if you have a solid friendship with the girl in question, she should at least understand you. Balls in your court for this one, I personally wouldn't do it but my 'agenda' is not leaning towards a relationship, which I'm going to assume you are - just a stab in the dark, considering it wouldn't be worth trying to get with a friend otherwise. - If you meet a girl, and don't tick her 'attracted to you' boxes, then you get lumped into the friend zone. Obviously, that is a huge generalisation of what could happen in just one particular scenario, but you get the picture. IMO if you are already in the true friend zone with somebody (ie. no romantic or sexual attraction) then I'd leave it and move on. Plenty more fish in the sea and is it worth risking a friendship? You may also find that by forgetting about it and moving on, that she may become interested in you. Why? Your natural change in behaviour towards her. There is a third option, which is leading on from what I said above. Some consider it manipulation, some consider it human nature. Essentially, though, if you are in the friend zone with somebody, it's because either the two of you are afraid to confront each other with your feelings (unlikely) or because one of you isn't attracted to the other. Simple answer, without getting too much into it? Be the alpha male, the badass. That doesn't mean be a **** and treat her like **** because that's not cool at all, but, well, IMO there is some truth in the whole 'nice guys finish last' thing. Just like two animals may battle it out in a show of 'alpha male' status to attract the female, a man may make fun of (not insult) a girl instead of complimenting her, may act very cool and distance as opposed to being close and clingy, etc. if he understands that is going to attract her. Don't try and force anything and be somebody you're not, but just let those natural qualities shine through. I'm not an expert, I am just basing what I'm saying from my experiences and the experiences of others. End of the day, anything like this isn't a science and it's all generalisations and the like. Dey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imoutgoodbye Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Does that mean you're turning him down? :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deykari Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Turning him down? More like turning him on, when he gets to mine in 20 minutes. Dey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raargant Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Maybe this will help. http://www.laddertheory.com/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deykari Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 ROFL when I saw that illustration of the man's ladder and saw the 'abyss' bit I just burst out laughing. EDIT: Then I read on, read the explanation, and realised it wasn't even that funny at all. Dey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corpsestomp Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Raar, you beat me to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a-guitarist Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Love, and games of the heart, is the hardest game to play. The only way to fully succeed? Love hard, love totally, and love honestly. If you like someone, let them know. If you don't feel the same after a short while, let them know. If you have a chance for an amazing thing, why not risk everything for it? The fall from love is one of the hardest I've had. It sucks, it hurts, it makes you want to give up. But it will get better. Get on the horse. Try again. How many times do you have to fail before you succeed at something? Keep trying. Keep going. Just give it your all. a-g Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bl3h Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 It's sort of like FL. Taking that fall is sort of like getting killed and full looted, you can either give up and delete, or keep on trucking. Get back on that horse and play it through till you condeath.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raargant Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Raar' date=' you beat me to it.[/quote'] Ladder theory is quite accurate in quite a few ways. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mudder Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 I didn't read any of the other replies but I will give my expert advice. For the most part, girls and guys both put people into the "Friend Category" when they themselves are not "into" that person. If a girl thinks your hot, no matter HOW long you've been friends, you're never in the friend zone. Get the idea? You know you're in the friend zone when the girl comes to you to talk about her guy problems and relies on you to "pick up the pieces." If you like a girl... Don't be that guy. Be the jerk that hurts her. Lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myrek Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 First impressions being what they are, I suggest writing this one off and making the right impression next time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iconz Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Man... when i posted that ladder theory years ago... like 2 forums ago or so... i got ripped by several people... most of the females who play were heated! Raargant posts it and everythin is honky dory? Thats that bs lol.... anyway... cut your losses man. Ive found that i dont fully enjoy the friendship of most of my "female friends"... we rarely consider the same things important... and they always want a level of attention that male friends dont demand... yeah thats right... they demand attention! Usually they're good for a few laughs but that is really about it. They love havin us as friends tho... b/c as ive been told by countless females "Guy friends arent catty like girls are". Pfff... not my problem now is it? Look... im not sayin that guys and girls cant be friends... but its hard to have that same kind of friendship that youd have w/ one of your boys b/c... well... your boys dont have a vagina. If you really have the hots for this chick... man up and let her know what the business is. Either she'll appreciate you manning up or she'll blow you off... at least you'll know where you stand and then you can decide the level of attention you want to give her. You just gotta decide whats more important... being her friend or gettin in them draws. If she's a one-of-a-kind friend shell stick around otherwise... *shrug*... chicks are a dime-a-dozen.... and i got a couple of dimes ya dig? __________________ Iconz - Keep your pimp hand strong, playa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L-A Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Maybe this will help. http://www.laddertheory.com/ Beat me to it. L-A Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pali Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Maybe this will help. http://www.laddertheory.com/ I'd never seen that site before... and you know what pisses me off the most about it? I can't argue with a single thing it says. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinblades713 Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 I'd never seen that site before... and you know what pisses me off the most about it? I can't argue with a single thing it says. I was thinking the same thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dale Posted July 14, 2008 Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Maybe this will help. http://www.laddertheory.com/ I just want to say that was awesome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mali Posted July 15, 2008 Report Share Posted July 15, 2008 Ladder theory is junk! Just tell her straight up how it is. Most people don't communicate well enough with each other even if they are friends or potential partners. If you tell her and you get rejected, who cares? At least you didn't hide something from her and from yourself. Then, you could move on with a lesson learned. However, if you win the reward will be great. Take the soldiers path and keep looking forward ... if you don't play the game with courage you are just going to waste time. The only way to fully succeed? Love hard, love totally, and love honestly. If you really have the hots for this chick... man up and let her know what the business is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aulian Posted July 15, 2008 Report Share Posted July 15, 2008 It's sort of like FL. Taking that fall is sort of like getting killed and full looted' date=' you can either give up and delete, or keep on trucking. Get back on that horse and play it through till you condeath..[/quote'] Wtf happens if you give up and delete? Bloody little emo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfdude Posted July 15, 2008 Report Share Posted July 15, 2008 A girl decides if shes going to ****/date/whatever you within the first 15 minutes of you meeting her. Just use her to find other hot girls like the rest of us. She'll either hook you up, or she'll want you. Most of the time she'll want you haha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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