Hulcran Hrerares

[Imoutgoodbye]

Four days ago was the last time I played as this character. I started questioning "Why?".

Well, it was obvious. Berserker seemed like an obvious path to Crusader. I enjoy playing melee types just a little more than mage or hybrids. And I really enjoyed my time in the Warmaster cabal.

Now, let's back it up here. I'm "aiming" for a Crusader. I know nothing about them. Could I play one? Maybe, they're not rare dependent. Yet, rumor abounds they're dependent on other things (first person to say what I'll sick Lytholm on...seriously, I don't want any qrace/class things even being hinted at on this thread). And it brings me back to being a berserker in the first place. Did I want to play a berserker or was it an easy path for me? And the more and more I thought the last few days, the more I wondered what the hell am I doing? Why am I playing? I feel nothing. I make characters aimed towards cabals.

I grasp at a race/class/cabal I have heard is either overpowered (my desire to try and be on top of the PK game) and fail with it or I grasp at something that's supposed to be decent or broken to try and make it more (can't really do this because I'm not good at PK and delude myself).

I also don't have the patience to go around and identify every single thing in game with mages/clerics and I quite honestly don't even want to think about it anymore. I don't want to use the scrolls from Miruvhor with a thief to identify. I don't want to run to Brambus all the time with my melees either.

Basically, I wonder why I play this game anymore at all. The climbs to 50 seem so long with training involved. Even the quests are usually more trouble than I have the patience for. And at 50, well, let's just say the atmosphere is different. I know the upcoming RP plots will invariably make things far more interesting, but it's a temporary thing.

I could go on and on about how time has become less and less for me and will completely disappear this fall, but I won't bore you all with details of my personal life any longer.

So, without further ado, I have deleted my berserker.

And this long winded old bastard will be on his way. I've deleted my telnet client, all descriptions, notes, applications, etc...my mud files are history. I can't find any reason for myself to stick around any longer. I know I've said adios before, but I just can't find it in myself to fade away without at least saying I'm going and leaving you one last link and a psalm.

Valek 106:34: "For thou shalt not blaspheme against the gods. It is from them that thou hast inherited this wonderful kingdom. Do not take them nor it for granted. Know that they do not take you for granted. Do not raise thine fists in anger against one another. Embrace each other and show reverence to thine Immortals. Amen."

*hands the Aabahranian Bible to Croyvern* Be a good chap and take good care of this **** will, ya?

Red Light

[Grim_Reefer]

You're not getting joy because it sounds like you're playing for all the wrong reasons. Try playing just to have fun, not to have a sickening pk combo.

[the_nightmare]

Yeah man, just try playing for fun

[Kyzarius]

did you pinn this one?

You shuld REALLY focus on grinding a character to con-death..

it is the ONLY way to learn pvp well.

[The-Nameless]

Valek man, you have been here so long, and this happens. Crusaders are not overpowered, no more than any qrace/class. They are dependant on a few things that all melee are, eq, weapon selection. But the class itself is number 1 INSANELY fun to play, and number 2 completely customizable. No two saders will play out the same unless someone OOC copies someone else's build. Zerk is not the strongest out there, espescially as a human, but those odd combos get attention. You should consider saying with a char for at least half their life. You are not letting yourself learn by dropping out so early. Your focus lay in getting to 50 and doing well in pk. You should try to just play yuor char, and let whatever is going to happen just happen. I am sad to see you go, as you are a fun, if not rude, personality of our forums. Hopefully if you are quitting, you remain an active member of our forums.

[mya]

I don't thing the problem with your characters was the combo or power-levels.

I think your characters normally fail because you want them to fail. You have a negative attitude and apparent lack of commitment that seriously hampers your playing potential and fun.

This is probably due to personal issues in your life, which I imagine to be quite complicated.

I would advice you to take this time to pause and reflect on your life.

Try to think about what you really want in your life and what you are willing to do to get it. Then set your foot on that path, one small step at a time, but always plowing through, towards your goals.

I am probably overly exaggerating but perhaps some professional help would aid you greatly in changing your life. Aiding you in setting goals, evaluating progress and teaching you how to self motivate.

It's just like runnning. Before most people have the discipline to run alone, they start by running with friends, each one pulling one another and creating motivation. Until discipline settles in and you are able to run alone.

[The-Nameless]

Professional help? Get a joint, that cures depression, anxiety, panic attacks, bitchyness, douchbaggery, asshatedness, appetite deficiency, as well as being a LEGITIMATE quality of life medication for terminally ill/long term handicaps. type 2 and 3 muscular dystrophy are among the top.

[npc_death]

Valek, I have been there repeatedly. It's easy to aim to be a PK powerhouse because those are the guys that seemingly (and I do mean seemingly) get all the RP attention. People who are lame at PK never seem to get titles, cabal leadership positions, etc. But that is an over-generalization that stems from envy of others' ability to PK. Someone who commands respect and becomes a famous character doesn't necessarily have to be a PK monster. I'm sure of it. It has to be true. If it's not, I too have wasted countless hours.

Why not set out a non-cabal related goal and make a character that is all about survival? Good clerics and be PK forces and nearly un-killable.

I'm on my planning period right now between classes, so I can't quite think, but I can assure you that you are far from alone. I have been there more times than I can count and can never seem to get out of the trenches. Despite that, I keep going with new and exciting possibilities and combos. You have to have hope that you too can matter in this game - with or without PK as your niche.

Also, try a thief if you want to have some real fun.

[Croyvern]

EXO 3:17 And I have said, I will bring you up out of the affliction of Egypt unto the land of the Canaanites, and the Hittites, and the Amorites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, unto a land flowing with milk and honey.

EXO 3:18 And they shall hearken to thy voice: and thou shalt come, thou and the elders of Israel, unto the king of Egypt, and ye shall say unto him, The LORD God of the Hebrews hath met with us: and now let us go, we beseech thee, three days' journey into the wilderness, that we may sacrifice to the LORD our God.

Rest Rev, take thy three days. Let thy mind consider only the Lord. Sacrifice unto him your concentration and your companionship. Offer him a drink, dinner, and conversation. When you rejoin us three days hence, you will reurn with the knowledge that your destiny lies within your heart, not your mind.

Rest well, and blessed be,

[tassinvegeta]

I am willing to take you on as my apprentice.

[The-Nameless]

The last thing FL needs is another tassin.

[klemkin]

Yes, I saw this coming. You have seemed unhappy for a little while now, with this game. For different reasons, than myself but you have seemed unhappy none the less. What I suggest to do is what my girlfriend suggested me to do which as worked.

Do something productive, instead.

I know most people here consider this game serious business, but I can't help but consider it a game. When a game starts pushing me from occassionally frustrated to angry or upset then I know something is wrong. Real life is for those feelings, not my free time in cyberspace.

It sounds like you've got enough of those feelings in your real life right now, and coming here has turned from pleasure to an escape.

I don't know if I am expressing myself adequately but I am not trying to beat up on the game. I am trying to tell you that I think I can follow what you are saying. I like this game, but I find that when I put more than an hour a day in to something, personally I become emotionally attached. When that happens, there is a big frustration when things do not go my way or when I feel cheated. I thought this to be only naturaly, but many people here seem very balanced about it. Maybe I am abnormal.

Either way, when things become more stable for you at home I am sure you will find things more stable with any game you play as well. Personally, I've returned to studying computer programming, chinese, and playing with my cat in my free time. Looking at how much time I spent on failed characters here is the only thing that depresses me now.

[Mali]

Deleted telnet client? No problem.

Download CMUD here http://www.zuggsoft.com/index.php?p=cmud

Aabahran, The Forsaken Lands: 216.136.9.8:1848