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Why Nerds are Unpopular


Pali

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I was recently linked to an essay titled "Why Nerds are Unpopular", written in 2003 by Paul Graham. I found it to be a very interesting analysis and critique of the structure of the US's secondary school system (I'm guessing that large parts of it would apply to most developed Western countries). It's pretty long, but I thought it a worthy read, and one that most people here would likely recognize a fair bit of themselves in.

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There is one very important statement in this essay:

We (nerds) were a bit like an adult would be if he were thrust back into middle school. He wouldn't know the right clothes to wear, the right music to like, the right slang to use. He'd seem to the kids a complete alien. The thing is, he'd know enough not to care what they thought. We had no such confidence.
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Heh... took a few days to read, eh? ;) A part I found very interesting was the structural comparisons of schools to prisons, in that they do in many ways serve simply as a place for kids to be while failing to give them any structure amongst themselves or anything practical to do.

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Ironically these seems very inaccurate as a standard for todays schools. My children are both in school (one in middle, one in elementery). Socially the kids, at least in our district, tend to turn against children who are immature in their development and social relationships. The "dorky" kids tend to not be singled out so much as the kids who act out for attention.

Showing advanced knowledge, or being smarter than average, tends to be less of a stigma while those kids that lash out bullying and seem unable to stay out of trouble quickly find themselves outside the group.

I think alot of this has to do with the early focus in our schools on not bullying others, and our overall social teachings these days that tend to lean towards acceptance and identifying others strong points while embracing differences.

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These are the exact reasons you needed to appear a jock in high school... and a closet mudder in your room. Do you think I actually enjoyed all the practices and pain that go into playing 3 sports? but damn did I love all the **** I didn't catch because I mattered on Friday night when the field lights came on.

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There really just wasn't popularity in the traditional sense in a small town school. Corruption? Yeah. Popularity? not so much.

I was a nerd and dated a cheerleader (red-head in the picture). I was also from one of the most poor families in school.

There wasn't anyone who had the physical ability to tangle with HBwillie and myself. So .. after freshman year getting "picked on" was basically impossible.

I have a vague memory of some kid in a "popular group" throwing food at me in the lunch room and I squashed what was thrown in the wrong popular guy's hair. They didn't do anything because they just didn't have any options.

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Your kids go to very different schools than the ones I remember going to, Kyz.

P.S. And that's a very good thing. If the kinds of problems referenced in this article are being fixed, hey, that is great.

oh yea, definatly. My school was in no way like my kids when it came to bullying and such. I was picked on mercilessly as a child haha.

of course now I have a hot wife, and my own buisness...while one of the main guys that picked on me in high school is a single garbage man, go figure hahaha (that was a REAL fun reunion for me)

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