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My make everyone feel better about themselves thread


KRins

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So this should make everyone feel better about the fact that they aren't the lamest person in the world. This really beautiful girl I've been digging for a while now finally gives me time of day and makes little hints she is going out to the local bar tonight with her friends while giving me her phone number. Now I know this girl does not drink. I also know this bar NEVER has a cover for over 21. So I'm all dressed and spent like 20 minutes making sure I was looking my meager best. I decide just before leaving that I'm not going to drink, I want to just hang out with this girl and not have her be uncomfortable I'm drinking and she isn't, etc. So in my brilliance I take my license out of my wallet, and leave my wallet at home. I get to the bar, the dude checks my ID, throws on a wristband... I am through the front door when a hand falls on my shoulder... "3 bucks homie" Of course I close my eyes for a second so I don't pass out from the pure unfairness of it all... and don't you know when I open them back up to rip off my wristband in disgust, she is standing there looking like Aphrodite... and watched me take off my wristband and walk away... Anyone wanna bet if I ever see her again?

See, now doesn't your mob death or full loot suddenly seem like a great alternative?

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You know, you're not stupid for leaving your money at home when you know your going out (on a date), okay you actually are. But the more stupid thing is that you didn't even call her out of the bar and explain the situation to her, asking her to lend you some money or at least to wait for you to go back home and get your wallet.

I had a situation like this once, when I was travelling with public transport to work and I forgot my money at home. So the person who has to charge me a ticket comes and I find out that I have no money. I ask her to wait a moment, look around the bus and go straight to the most attractive girl I manage to lay my eyes on. I explain the situation, ask her to lend me some money so I can pay my ticket, she did. I go pay my ticket and then go back to her and ask her for her phone so I can ehm, how do you call this in english... rematch or something (return the favour?) later. She gave it to me and we had some fun.

But I've also had silly situations like that. Especially when I was younger (read inexperienced :P )

Btw, I've found out that one of the things girls (especially good looking ones) hate the most is being cheap. So, if she ever calls you again she surely likes you A LOT :P I would actually advise YOU to call her and explain the situation and try to ask her out again, if she really is that good looking and is worth the humiliation of admitting that your an idiot :)

PS. What would really make me feel better though is learning how to use PARAGRAPHS :)

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It was written in despair... I wasn't in an emotional place to properly divide my sob story into paragraphs. That being said, I did call her, she had a good laugh, and did say "well, another time then." I even managed to successfully land a "Well, I'll call you tomorrow then." which hit for the maximum "Alright, I'll be waiting." Also I guess American bars are different than yours... we have music blaring at roughly 100 decibels... all I could convey to her at the bar was a pained look.

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im sorry, but who goes clubbing without taking some cash?

taxi cash, emergency cash, oh **** I need to pay the bouncer cash?

Buy her a non alcholholic drink cash, buy you something to sip on (be it a damn coke) cash so you dont look like a schlub?

Ditch this noisy place and go have a quiet drink at a restauraunt cash?

prior planning prevents piss poor presentation

My wife and I, first serious date. She had brought a friend to keep an eye on her. I had a hotel room on standby, a taxi reserved (for the friend) and three places scoped out just in case they didnt like one or the other. Ended up going to two of the three places, the friend got to drunk (ooops ;)) and got sent home in the taxi and my future wife and I ended up in the hotel. bwuahahah I love a plan when it all works.

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Epic...epic fail. Your license is for much more needed things. What if you ran into a checkpoint or something on your way home? Get pulled over for a taillight that you didn't know was out.

Let alone not bringing money for anything that could have potentially happened AFTER the club if things had even gone the way you anticipated them going at the club....

Lessons learned for next time I suppose!

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Complete noobfail. I don't even know why it crossed your mind to leave your wallet at home. My wallet has all of my important ****, so it remains on my person at ALL times. In order to get my wallet, you have to loot it from my corpse. As far as that girl goes, don't ask her to dinner. Dinner/movie/bar/ whatever, all that **** is cliche and girls know it. Ask her to go to the zoo with you, I swear this will be a shoe in.

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Women (most anyway) have this odd like for men who are making them laugh. So I guess you scored on her good side there actually. Definitely take some money along next time, I'd also suggest a more quiet place, perhaps cinema and a drink after (milkshake, coke, soda, etc.) where you can chat.

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You know what is the worst part of this all... leaving my wallet behind seemed like a PERFECT idea. Remember this young men of FL... if you ever get so nervous about a date that you think you are going to throw up... have someone else make the important decisions for you.

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Also I guess American bars are different than yours... we have music blaring at roughly 100 decibels... all I could convey to her at the bar was a pained look.

Of course there is loud music, but you've got your hands with you at least, you can gesture her to come out with you :P

By the way, where the hell do you carry your condoms if you leave you wallet at home? :)

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KRins' date=' you're a MAN. You should never be nervous about meeting up with a woman. You could easily kick her teeth out if it was necessary. Don't be afraid of things you could crush.[/quote']

I just got a flashback from conan the barbarian...

Old man: Young dude what is best in life?

Young dude: Something about riding a horse, feeling the wind in your hair, and a falcon on your wrist:

Old man: No, Conan, what is best in life?

Conan: To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.

Old man: Good.

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Glad to see that someone else knows about the 6 P's, although the owners of my company use them slightly differently.

Proper planning positively prevents poor performance.

Krins - never leave your wallet at home, ever. Leave it in the glove box if you absolutely cannot have it on you.

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KRins' date=' you're a MAN. You should never be nervous about meeting up with a woman. You could easily kick her teeth out if it was necessary. Don't be afraid of things you could crush.[/quote']

You think I don't know that? Which is why I was so far off my game. I don't get nervous... job interviews are a breeze, the state finals back in high school... I woke up 5 minutes before my match and was asleep again 5 minutes after. But this one... this one is different.

f0xx: Storing a condom in your wallet is probably the best way outside of a sharp instrument to have it fail. I stop at the damn gas station... granted, I never wait for my change...

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Tell her you had to leave to go hang out when your brother in the hospital.

Then go home and break your brothers legs.

Are you volunteering to masquerade as my brother, since I don't have one? You guys are missing the point... I wasn't coming here to get further trashed, I know I blew it. I was coming here to let everyone know... sometimes you aren't having the worst day in the world, sometimes someone blew it slightly harder than you did.

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I could try and top that story, but everyone would know I wasn't telling the truth so I shall leave it at this.

Sorry that really sucked for you. But on the bright side you DEFINITELY know she likes you now. She wasn't all 'Have to meet him in the bar and be all friends zone on him so he won't continue to make advances.'

She went 'Can't wait to talk to you.' Aw, you're clumsy and forgetful in that cute puppy way. I want to take you home.

You're in man.

There's always a bright side, just think, she may have already stopped at the gas station for you....:D

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I just got a flashback from conan the barbarian...

Old man: Young dude what is best in life?

Young dude: Something about riding a horse, feeling the wind in your hair, and a falcon on your wrist:

Old man: No, Conan, what is best in life?

Conan: To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.

Old man: Good.

I think Pratchett's version easily tops this:

Barbarian chieftain: "What then are the greatesst things that a man may find in life?"

Barbarian1: "The crisp horizon of the steppe, the wind in your hair, a fresh horse under you."

Barbarian2: "The cry of the white eagle in the heights, the fall of snow in the forest, a true arrow in your bow."

Chieftain: "Surely it is the sight of your enemy slain, the humilation of his tribe and the lamentation of his women."

Conan: "Hot water, good dentishry and shoft lavatory paper."

(THE LIGHT FANTASTIC)

And Grim, with your attitude it wouldn't be astonishing if you got more kicks in the ... than kisses from the ladies :P

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