egreir Posted September 30, 2016 Report Share Posted September 30, 2016 At the ripe old age of 31 I managed to escape being married or having children. I've lived life on the edge knowing the only person I was responsible for was me. However now due to some unfortunate circumstances and my inability to say no...I have 5 children, ages 3 5 6 11 12....and I'm learning so much.... - Jolly rancher stains in the carpet are hard to get off -There is no sense of personal space or privacy -Plan on spending an extra 10 minutes chasing down shoes and last minute bathroom needs before you have to leave -Approximately 36.8% of the food you buy will end up in the carpet somehow -Just when you think you know what a sick child wants, they will laugh at you as you fail to soothe them -Lying is a natural thing, learned early on in life -Monkey see, monkey do -Drinks after 730pm end up urinated into sleeping areas -You can not simply hug one child without hugging them all due to jealous temper tantrums -Pre teen girls are a nightmare -Sex with their mother must begin and end in under 5 minutes and be muffled with light choking -You only think you had 3 dollars in quarters on that bookshelf, now you have nothing -There is no such thing as spill proof Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamikazi Posted September 30, 2016 Report Share Posted September 30, 2016 Dude...I freaking hate you, but you got yourself into some serious shit and I kind of feel your pain. Very brave, mate...Very brave. P.S.- You're still a scumbag in my eyes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaunticles Posted October 1, 2016 Report Share Posted October 1, 2016 look at the bright side, least it's not 5 children from 5 different mothers taking you to court for child support. and no this isn't my situation but I know someone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FatMike Posted October 1, 2016 Report Share Posted October 1, 2016 Wait till potty training is pretty much done and instead of peeing the bed at 2:30 am and snoozing right through it they start waking you up. Still rather be woken up but that most definitely isn't what I'm thinking at the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ambroas Posted October 1, 2016 Report Share Posted October 1, 2016 HAHAHAHA! I can laugh because I have five as well. 14 boy, 9 boy, 6 boy, almost 5 girl, 3 girl autistic. It doesn't get better but you learn to cope and laugh it off. Plus I just tell myself in years they'll be gone and I'll rip out all this carpet for hardwood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
f0xx Posted October 1, 2016 Report Share Posted October 1, 2016 Things people do for some sex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egreir Posted October 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2016 I know right? She cooks cleans makes her own money and respects/appreciates me. All that for some sex, what a silly girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mya Posted October 4, 2016 Report Share Posted October 4, 2016 I hope you at least make some of your own. If you can provide for 5 you can for 7. Also, teaching older ones to take care of young ones is a good way to reduce your worries and make them grow right. Specially if they are girls. If something happens, you will be very thankful for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egreir Posted October 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2016 4 girls and 1 boy...I'm having to spend all my trains in PAT (patience) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FatMike Posted October 5, 2016 Report Share Posted October 5, 2016 Way to much estrogen! Way to much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egreir Posted October 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted October 5, 2016 Tell me about it. Add another to the list: The question is not whether there will be a stain in the carpet, it's how many in one week will there be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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