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egreir

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If the child is quiet don't touch it.

Make a fair amount of noise while they are sleeping(music, tv), that way bumps in the night don't wake them.

Dont rock the child, once you start rocking it you will 'always' have to rock it for its own comfort.

If the child is crying it's either hungry, gassy, bored, tired or needs a new diaper. Excessive crying may warrant a trip to the doctor to check for lactose intolerances or something of the sort.

Have the nurses teach you how to swaddle it properly.

Dont be afraid to prop the baby on its side or lay it on its belly, looking up at the ceiling all day long to a newborn is like a never ending free fall. 

Be sure to feed it a variety of foods while it is young, too many children live off candy and McDonald's :) 

UC

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Sleeping with your child in your bed is a no-no for many reasons, especially as a newborn/infant.  If nothing else, they won't expect to crawl into bed with you for every little thing when they're a toddler.

Everything they do in the first few years is normal.  The tyke may not be walking at 2 years, but that's normal.  They may take a while to talk, but that's normal.
You spend the first 3 years trying to get them to walk and talk and the next 15 telling them to sit down and shut up. :D

 

3 hours ago, Unknown Criminal said:

If the child is quiet don't touch it.

But check in on them to make sure they're not repainting their room.

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Some good advice up there. Let me add a couple even they may not have heard.

Being tipped backward is disorienting to all of us, combine that with a wet landing and you create panic. Bathe newborns facing the water holding them in one hand across the chest, like you might hold a large roast.

Start solid foods earlier than any parenting book tells you to. I suggest a poached egg well before six months. Complex foods take longer to digest than breast milk. (its harder to break down a little bit of two foods, than a whole lot of one)  Wait a minute Fool! What does that mean? Its simple, babies only do one thing. Turn food to crap. They do it while awake, and while they sleep. It takes energy to do this. The extra energy burned on the eggs will help you get the child to start sleeping over night MUCH sooner.

They will be fragile which will give you reason to panic every time something happens that YOU think is going to hurt. The learn from you, they depend on, and react to your responses. NEVER cry out if they fall, best to laugh, if they believe you think they are ok, they will follow your lead.

What ever else you do, leave all filthy language at the door when you enter the room. They WILL repeat, and usually at the most embarrassing and in opportune time.

 

 

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40 minutes ago, egreir said:

The baby will be in the bed with us, that's not my call.  Mama is a strong advocate of nursing and co-sleeping.

I told my wife I'm not comfortable with the baby in bed with us.  Something something suffocation and overheating.  Cot next to the bed was fine.
If she's that adamant: https://www.babycentre.co.uk/a558334/co-sleeping-and-safety

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Give them red bull before they go to nana's, let them ramp their bike, cake is fine for breakfast as long as it has a fruity icing, start buying white clothes, my niece vomits on me every time i held her while she was an infant and I liked dark colors. Baby vomit is hard to scrub out. 

Ryan Reynolds had a funny bit of wisdom for new fathers. Feed the baby when it cries at 4 am, change the diapers. A human being just exited your wife, she has done enough, it's your turn.

 

I am very very very against co-sleeping. In eigth grade I was woken up by my neighbor beating on my door at 6 am. She had rolled over on the baby in her sleep, and was screaming for anyone to help. I had to comfort a hysterical new mom because her baby wasn't breathing. I wont ever get that image out of my head. there are plenty of bedside cribs, or hang-ons, to use for co-sleeping. But sleeping directly with the parents is nothing but dangerous. I dont care how many people it has worked fine for. 

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Prepare for your baby to be sick. They will be sick every month in the first 2 years - particularly if they go to daycare. 

This is normal. You will also get sick. Being sick from a baby sickness... Is aweful, our immune systems have forgotten whatever it is babies catch. 

Remember that your baby is not bullet proof but also not made of glass. They will fall, they will hurt themselves, but like @Fool_Hardy said, they will react based on how you react - laugh it off and you'll figure out your kid thinks they're bullet proof which is a good thing. 

Solids thing is a good idea! Also let your baby try everything. The larger their palette the better, the more they experience the better!

 

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Strongly disagree on introducing solids too soon, go with your pediatrician's recommendation on that front. It's an old wive's tale that babies need eggs, rice, mashed potatoes or other foods in order to sleep through the night.

If your wife is insisting on co-sleep (despite the very real danger of death), get a product called "DockATot," it provides an enclosed area to make parents less likely to roll over them while sleeping. It's safer, still not the most safe option. There are also bassinets that push right up against a bed.

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You will find a lot of good advice online but you will also find tons of misinformation. Go with what your pediatrician says. My wife and I cosleep with our son and have ever since he outgrew his basonet around 5 months. He is 15 months now.

There were moments I wanted to cast my kid against the stones, 300 style "This is Sparta!!" But there are more moments as a father where I watch him and say to myself, "Damn this is awesome!"

I highly suggest purchasing one of these. For my wife and I, it gave us a peace of mind that otherwise we would not have had.

https://owletcare.com/

For food we did the "Baby Led Weaning" at 6 months. Worked great for us. Most of these types of choices are going to be your own personal choices in what you feel is best for your kid. Lots of judges out there and they won't always agree how you do things. Get ready for it.

Edit: To add on... While old folks who raised their kids 20+ years ago may have some great advice, just realize that medicine regarding infants and babies in general has come very far from where it was then. So things may have changed. I have had to fight with my mom over and over about the choices my wife and I made.

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5 hours ago, egreir said:

The baby will be in the bed with us, that's not my call.  Mama is a strong advocate of nursing and co-sleeping.

There's nothing really wrong with nursing and over the years has shown it can be better for them to do so early on rather than using formula. Co-sleeping can be though as it has been linked to higher SIDS rates, but it's also not known exactly why either. I would recommend a crib nearby if you or she toss and turn a lot in your sleep though. Sleeping habits also can develop in these early stages. My mom did this with my youngest brother and he couldn't sleep in his own bed until he was 10 or 11. I ended up eventually dating someone who did the exact same thing in which I didn't know about until well after the fact, so your sex life goes down the crapper. My other brother and I slept in our cribs as babies, we both turned out fine. Though he needs someone in the bed to sleep and I prefer a lot of room despite the fact I don't toss and turn in my sleep anymore after some medical issues in my early 20's. You're not going to be able to convince her to eliminating co sleeping though, I've found that once anyone has an idea in their mind made up, you're not going to change it without huge fights. Even if there's evidence supporting any negative behavior changes. 

Eally food habit changes aren't a bad thing either, but I'd suggest starting that at 6 months versus any earlier. I ate green beans in large quantities because I didn't want anything else really. I loathe them now. When they're colic, it sucks ass, but hopefully yours isn't going to be like that. If they are, do your best not to flip your lid and try to find something that works for both of you to quiet them. It may be something as simple as being held or played with, but you can find car rides or walks can be just as useful. Do not use web M.D. to diagnose kids ever. Information is widely available, but using it to only cause yourself or your SO to just freak out about what it could be is stupid. If you're worried, take them in and don't try to be one of those know it all types because it is insulting and annoying to many doctors. I know this because of my baby brother who has a lot of health issues and is now 23 and my mom still does that. 

Finally, don't just follow advice that everyone may give you. Just because they have a kid doesn't make them an expert. In fact, see wheat works best for yours first before trying to implement other people's way of thinking. The bath thing is some good solid advice though. You'll either really enjoy it or hate it depending on who you are. I myself have no kids, but I'm also the oldest of all the grandchildren in my family by many years and I've dated plenty of single mothers. Write down the things that work and don't, that way if you're too sleep deprived to remember, read about it to make those days go better. The #1 thing I hear most though is to sleep when they do. That way if you spend the night up with them you can still get decent sleep during the day if needed. This works best usually in cases where it's single parenthood though so you may not need to in a relationship. 

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I've got a 2 and half year old - with another due quite literally any day.

Listen to everybody's advice - don't take any of it as gospel.  Every baby is different - and what worked for one Kid won't work for another.  Some Babies will sleep better in the same room as you, some will sleep better moved into a Nursery earlier.  Some will transition to soft solids at 6 months - some will still struggle with anything more than Baby Rice at 9 months.

There is no golden bullet - try different things and go with what works.  Don't try and force something because 'It worked for English Lad on the Forums with his baby!"

I'm a bit of a researcher by nature so along the way I've looked up Controlled Crying, Pick up Put down.. You name it, I read an article and watched a Youtube video on it.  We tried all sorts of things, and almost every thing that 'worked' for us was because we amended it slightly to suit him, rather than trying to make him fit the model.

Most of all - just enjoy it - they are small for such a short period of time.  I rocked my Boy to get him to sleep - Did it mean he got into a habit of it? Yes? Did it mean I got less sleep for a few months until he grew out of it? Yes.  Has it given me some of the best memories I will ever have it my life? Yes.

If I can give one piece of advice its a mantra that has become a major part of my life these last few years - Its religious in origin - but I'm not.

"This to shall pass."

Every time you are tired, frustrated or struggling, remember that this is only for a short period of time, and later in life you will look back fondly and remember how wonderful it was to have a small person that was totally devoted to you in every way.  Don't sweat the small stuff, if you have to do stuff that isn't "In the Book" to make it more comfortable and enjoyable for everybody, just do it.  Whether you rock your baby or not - they are still going to be ignoring you and going off and doing their own thing in a few years, enjoy the time with them while you have it.

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If you are a multi-language household, make sure they get the secondary (non-dominant language in the region you live) early and often. Some of the physiological aspects lock during the 0-6 month range and you'll often have a difficult time overcoming them later. The wider range of language exposure they have earlier, the more flexible their capabilities later -- and not only in language skills. Language flexibility enhances a lot of other non-language mental processes.

Of course wide exposure applies to everything, not just language. Music is another example. I have a 5 month old baby and our big thing right now is 'opposite motor skills'. Practicing using opposite hands (and in our case feet, haha) to do different things.

She is starting to vocalize new sounds (and screeches). She also developed a kind of pidgin language with the dogs. They sit there and coo at each other.

As for food: We are still doing only breast milk (at 5 months), but our doctor recommended testing foods at a rate of one new food/week starting around the 6 month mark. The reason is to isolate allergic reactions but it also develops (positive) sensitivity in the taste buds. If you don't try it as a baby, there is a good chance you won't like it as a child or adult. Nutritionally, our doctors say that breast milk is good for as long as you are willing to do it, so solid food introduction isn't as focused on the nutritional aspects. Ou

Our doctors have explicitly said that early introduction (before 4 months) of solid foods doesn't generally harm the baby as it has been done for generations, but they still recommend waiting until the infant is at least 4 months.

Sleeping: We've been told not to sleep with the baby and obey that, but we also recognize that people have been doing it forever. So you have to decide if the risk of rolling over is greater than the benefit of more skin-to-skin time. In our case, we don't ever sleep with the baby, but we will nap/doze in a chair or something together. Our baby sleeps overnight in a crib next to the bed.

Just assess your own capabilities. If you are a heavy sleeper or roll in your sleep, don't do it. If you drink or otherwise take drugs that make you sleep deeply, don't do it. We don't get too excited about it either way.

 

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