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Kelmi Luikero, Ratman. Warlord.


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I'll post this now for people to see. I was insanely drunk, asshole, paranoid and generally ass towards everyone. Apologies for that everyone.

Description:

Quote

You recognize the signature traits of the Feral in this critter.
Human and rodent attributes have curiously mingled, but the
hybridization is imperfect, even flawed in some aspects.
As far as you can tell, the facial features are mostly human,
yet somehow unnatural, artificial even. Considering the
masculinity of the creatures face, you are able to guesstimate
its sex as male. A pair of ears, elongated and pointy, peek out
under snow-white mop of hair. Beady, bright-red eyes, alertly
observing the environment, confirm your suspicion of albinism.
The glimmer in those eyes suggests both sentience and cunning.
The nasty grin of this rodent reveals a flashy set of pointy
teeth - perfect for gnawing. His body is coated with mangy,
white fur, which covers everything below the neck. His limbs are
imbued with humanoid strength and motility, but instead of hands
and feet, the limbs terminate in clawed paws. Disturbingly, this
rat-man appears to have functional thumbs, which it uses to clutch
weapons and tools, albeit with some difficulty. A bald, sinewy
tail extends from his backside. It twitches erratically every now
and then, as if it has a mind of its own.

Gear:

Quote

Kelmi is using:
<used as light>        (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) the War Banner of Ralardia
<worn on finger>       the Ring of Abyss
<worn on finger>       (Glowing) (Humming) a heavy-black dragonscale ring
<worn around neck>     (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) a string with a bunny paw
<worn around neck>     (Glowing) (Humming) a dark moonstone pendant
<worn on head>         (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) a helm of spell-turning
<worn on ear>          the Eye of Manticore
<worn on torso>        (Magical) (Glowing) an imperious plate
<worn on arms>         (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) the Bracer of Serpents adorned with an emblem of Gear
<worn on hands>        (Glowing) (Humming) the Gauntlets of Rage
<worn on legs>         (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) Soulreaver's shadow
<worn on feet>         a pair of padded slippers
<worn about body>      (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) a Major Globe of Invulnerability
<worn about waist>     (Glowing) Ephemeral Scabbard
<worn around wrist>    a Vargo family heirloom
<worn around wrist>    a Vargo family heirloom
<wielded>              (Humming) an ancient sceptre adorned with a razor crystal
<dual wielded>         (Magical) (Glowing) (Humming) "Masher," the Chieftain's Mace adorned with crystal spike
<left sleeve>          (Glowing) (Humming) the Meat Kleefer adorned with a starshard
<right sleeve>         (Humming) the Meat Kleefer adorned with a glowing ember
<worn on face>         (Humming) some Chieftain's Warpaint
<floating nearby>      a simple wooden wheel
<in the quiver>        nothing.

<1079/1079hp 604/604m 527/527mv> D 4 4634 <15348 GOLD> 
i
You are carrying:
     a barrel of milk
     (Magical) (Glowing) "Masher," the Chieftain's Mace adorned with a soul tear
     a travel bag
     (Humming) Godforged Battleplate
     the Fang of the Broodmother
     (Glowing) (Humming) a Band of Order
     the Monorod
     (Humming) a broken terminator
( 6) a bloodwolf's eye
     the Inner Fire
     (Glowing) The Ring of the Sea-Elves
     (Glowing) Rod of Stars
     'Heartsbane' the Spear of War
     a combat visor
     a small canoe
     (Glowing) (Humming) Kelmi's Bonemeal adorned with a fel charm
     a sturdy backpack
     (Glowing) (Humming) a necklace with a lion charm

No scoresheet. 

Emotes, etc:

Quote

Basic, idle scratching:
emote stretches his hind foot behind his neck and starts scratching behind the ears.
emote stretches his hind foot behind his neck and suddenly freezes for a moment.
smote After a moment, Kelmi starts to move again and starts scratching behind the ears.
smote A squeak of pleasure chirrups while Kelmi grooms his head.
smote A faint squeak of pleasure chirrups while Kelmi grooms his tail.
smote A slight squeak of satisfaction chirrups while Kelmi grooms the hair of his back.


Emote/Smote says:
smote "%1", Kelmi says and squeaks shortly.
emote lets out a long squeak and says, "%1"

Laughs:
smote Kelmi, seemingly amused, emits a burst of extremely high-pitched chirps.
emote appears to be laughing, but you do not hear anything. How curious.

Edgecraft:
emote gnaws around the edges of some %1.;edge %1

Cock waving: 
pmote Kelmi walks to %1 and slightly raises his hind foot. A few smears of something wet dribble on %1.

Friendly pissing:
smote A wet smear can be seen on %1 as Kelmi passes by.

Compulsive/automated behavior: (like the nose twitch, tail movements)
emote sways from side to side as he tries to see something clearer.

smote In a blur of movement, Kelmi's whiskers twitch as he evaluates the situation.
smote Kelmi's tail twitches erratically.

Backstab:
smote Drumming his feet to the ground first as to gather energy, Kelmi jumps towards %1 with all limbs thrown forward like a fuzzy spear!;back %1

History:

Quote

history edit

It is common knowledge that rats infest the sewers - gnawing on everything
even remotely edible. The case with the sewers of Miruvhor is no different. 
A rat population thrives alongside the urchins and orphans hiding there,
who - occasionally - are massacred after some lunatic comes to
sacrifice them in the name of one who calls himself Reskath. The remains
of the children are a feast for the rats, who breed unchecked like, well...
rats.

The life of a single rat is usually rather straightforward and uneventful.
It eats, defecates, copulates and dies, usually within the first year of
its life, in the same sewers it was born.

This one, curious looking rat, was slightly different from the others
of its litter. It was enjoying the simple life in the shadows,
gnawing on rotting guts of some creature it knew nothing about.
The rat probably thought it was the best thing it had ever tasted.

But suddenly it caught a whiff of an odd, alien scent, which overwhelmed 
the familiar aromas of the sewers. It followed its nose to a curious
looking contraption. The rat had never seen one like it, but the scent 
beckoned it to investigate. It found an opening on the side of the device,
and crawled through without a second thought.

*CLACK CLACK*

The opening disappeared behind the rat, and moments later a soft hum
filled the small cavity. Slowly, the rat started to feel very sleepy,
and dozed off, dreaming of the strange scent.

@

journal to Immortal
journal subject History: Journal of the Magi
journal edit

First entry                                                       1973 BC

Day I:
Finally, the testing environment is ready and my request to access the Aether
has been approved. I have my mazes, puzzle boxes and other testing apparatus
fully operational. Master wants me to create a genius breed of rats to use
as spies, infiltrators and saboteurs - a daunting task for anyone, even if 
Master had not given me unique tomes of ancient knowledge to peruse. Now I
only have to wait for my assistant to return with the test subjects he is
supposed to trap.  

Day III:
My assistant brought me the rats, but as he was leaving, he knocked over one
of my test vial racks and made a terrible mess. I lost a whole day just airing
out the laboratory, because the spilled chemicals mixed and formed noxious gases!
By (DEITY), that man is a brute, and a clumsy one to boot. He is also too stupid
to assist in my research. If I had no need for a constant stream of fresh test
subjects, he would be nothing but waste of breathable air. What was his name
again? Loi, or something like that? Anyway, I still have to notch the ears of
these rats, so I can tell them apart.  

Day VI:
I have managed to determine which rats are the smartest based on several trials
and puzzles. I incinerated the ones that did not make it to the top ten. The survivors
will undergo a strict training regimen, and I will feed them elixirs, which supposedly
foster cognitive faculties.

Day XXIV:
After comparing the results of the modified rats to non-modified rats, I see a threefold
increase in problem solving, 50 percent increase to appetite, and a marked increase in 
willingness to explore. Unfortunately, no matter how hard I push them, they will not improve
further. It appears that I have reached the limits of this method.

Day XXX:
Uncovering the brain, and exposing it to raw Aether while channeling a stream of weak
evocation magic finally did the trick. I created rat geniuses! Unfortunately, all my
test subjects perished a few hours later due to what appears to be massive brain trauma.
My oaf of an assistant (turns out his name is actually Lui) will have to fetch more.

Day L:
Lui brought me a white rat today. Curious. It seems very smart and capable, and I have a much
easier time to handle it. Due to its lack of coloration I can easily find the vein and draw blood.
This gave me the idea to breed it so I can hopefully get more of them. It would make my job easier
and I would no longer have to wait for that imbecile assistant of mine. He smells of sewer.

DAY L + six months: I have arrived to the conclusion that rat brains are simply not
sophisticated enough for what my work demands. Therefore, I must look into other solutions if I aim
to create sentient rats that follow orders. My master will be displeased. However, I'll be keeping a
small rat population housed in my laboratory just in case. They are useful test subjects, after all.
All of them are albinos and direct descendants of the white rat Lui caught several months ago. 

Magi Ahuj Utsak
@
journal post

journal to Immortal
journal subject Journal of the Magi
journal edit

Second entry                                                    1974 BC

Day CCCLXX:
I may have approached my rat problem from the wrong angle. Instead of 
creating intelligent rats, I should have taken readily available intellect
and transferred it into them. Too bad rat and human brains differ too much
in size, which excludes a direct brain transfer. However, after searching
the library for months, I stumbled upon a tome, which details incantations
of the obscure art of polymorphy.


Day CCCLXXV:
Polymorph magic is too unstable to utilize. Melding two rats together, even if successful,
spontaneously reverts after a few seconds, liquefying the test subjects in the process.
I must find a way to stabilize the meld.  

Day CCCLXXX:
Success! Casting the polymorph spell using concentrated Aether as the conduit, I've
melded two rats into a single one, apparently healthy rat! What's more, the magical
weave holds, and I cannot detect it with my divination. I have no idea how long it will last.
Maybe it is permanent. It is time to summon my assistant back from his vacation.

Day CCCLXXXI:
At last, I am ready for another attempt. My "willing" test subjects, a heavily sedated
human named Lui Kero and an albino rat #23 are ready in the test chamber. I have fashioned
wands containing the necessary magic. Once the conditions are suitable, I shall
zap them both simultaneously, and the Aether should do the rest.

Day CCCLXXXII:
My experiment has failed! The size difference must have been too great, because
Lui absorbed the rat essence, yet remained his own size and did not change at all.
Questioning him yields very little, as the fool apparently lost his memory in the
process. I have placed him in quarantine for now, so that he does not explode
in an inconvenient location.

Day (barely readable):
Something is wrong with Lui. He has started to grow fur all over his body. White fur.
And his face, ugly as it were before, has twisted out of proportions. It looks
eerily uncanny now, not entirely human. Some of his fingers are starting to fuse
together. I had him stripped nude, and sure enough, he has started to grow a tail! 
My hypothesis is that he is slowly turning into a giant rat. So far, his mental
abilities, sub-par as they were, haven't yet deteriorated. Time will tell whether
the rat form takes over completely and he turns into a mindless beast. I've heard
tales of werewolves and other beastly humanoids, called Ferals, but who has ever
heard of a Rat-man? But one thing is for sure, he will make a piss-poor infiltrator,
sticking out like a sore thumb, and thus my project has failed. 

Magi Ahuj Utsak
@
journal post

Journals were bunch, filling the history more:

Quote

journal to Immortal
journal subject Kelmi's journal, entry one
journal edit

Master created Kelmi to be a tool, infil-trator? Apparently,
I was too big for that. No good for anything Master said.
Kelmi did always what Master ordered it to, but it was not enough.

My qualities and abilities didn't fill the purpose Master wanted.
So Master got rid of Kelmi. Perhaps wanted that I .. die?

That would explain why the big men of Master dragged me away 
from my cell to some murky place. Oddly, it felt like I was in 
home, but how that could be? Something happened there, but I do
not know for sure what. The big men left and I was left there
alone... in a murky but cosy, wet sewers.

It has been now five years since Master got rid of me. In the 
beginning I felt lost and truly that I have no purpose in this ..
place. 

Curiosity drove me out the Sewers after I observed many ... adventurers
of different, odd species venture down the sewers to do some odd tasks.
I was curious who their Master is, that orders them around.

Obviously the sight of me made the adventurers cringe in the terror many
times and they either fled the area or tried to kill me.. I just hid away
in the shadows and vanished the scene myself then.

Finally I managed to find someone whom didn't want to kill me or think I'm
a threat to her. She was odd mix of a some furry animal and a human. It 
felt bit like she was kin to me. Her name was Anita and she worked for 
Master in guild of the Thieves. 

She introduced me to the guild and I it felt good to fulfill orders 
again. It felt like I have a purpose. They didn't mind that I'm bigger
than a common rat. I think they said "yer fine as ya are".
Slowly I learned the skills they utilize in their line of work.

Join the army:

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
 *                                                                 *
 *  DO NOT JOIN THE WARMASTERS                                     *
 *                                                                 *
 *  DO NOT STAND ON YOUR OWN TWO OR FOUR FEET                      *
 *                                                                 *
 *  DO NOT MAKE A DIFFERENCE                                       *
 *                                                                 *
 *  DO NOT MAKE FRIENDS THAT LAST A LIFETIME                       *
 *                                                                 *
 *  DO NOT FIND WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF                            *
 *                                                                 *
 *  DO NOT BECOME A BETTER YOU                                     *
 *                                                                 *
 *                                                                 *
 *                                             [WARMASTER]         *
 *                                               KELMI             *
 *                                                                 *
 *                                                                 *
 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
 *                                                                 *
 *  AN RATMAN HERO!                                                *
 *                                                                 *
 *  ONE WARMASTER DEFEATS                                          *
 *  TEN SAVANT MAGIS.                                              *
 *        _-~~~-_       _-~~~-_                                    *
 *       /~       ~\    :    ,  \                                  *
 *      '           ~   ,   |:  :                                  *
 *     {      /~~\  :--~""""\.:  :                                 *
 *      \    (... :   /^\  /^\\ ;                                  *
 *       ~\_____     |   | | |:~                                   *
 *             /     |__O|_|O|;                                    * 
 *            (     /       O \                                    *
 *             \   ( `\_______/)                                   *
 *              `\  \         /                                    *
 *              )  ~-------~'\                                     *
 *               /              \                                  *
 *             :               ||                                  *
 *             |  |            ||                                  *
 *             |  |.======[]==+'|                                  *
 *            (~~~~)       |   |~)                                 *
 *            /    \       |   | \                                 *
 *~\          \___/)______/^\__|_/                                 *
 *  `\\      //    |  |      | |                                   *
 *    `\\__//'     |  |      | |                                   *
 *       ~~       (~~~~)    (~~~)                                  *
 *               /     =\..'    =_                                 *
 *              |__________)________)                              *
 *                                                                 *
 *  WARMASTER KELMI LUIKERO                                        *
 *                                                                 *
 *  GLADIATORS OF WARMASTERS                                       *
 *                                                                 *
 *  HAVE YOU NO WISH TO EMULATE THE SPLENDID                       *
 *  BRAVERY OF YOUR FELLOW WARMASTER?                              *
 *                                                                 *
 *  JOIN WARMASTERS TODAY                                          *
 *                                                                 *
 *                                             [WARMASTER]         *
 *                                                                 *
 *                                                                 *
 *                                                                 *
 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

S3ErGfh.png

Taunting and strong pop culture references:

I am a magi who walks alone
And when I'm walking a dark road
At night or strolling through the forest

When the light begins to change
I sometimes feel a little strange
A little anxious when it's dark
                   ,^,
                  /    \.
                 /  . -  \
                 \       /
          - ---.,:.-_-.<
         \    _; , / ).|
          \  ; / `  `"  '\
           '.-| ;-.____, |             .,
               \ `._~_/ /             /"/
  ,.           /`-.__.-'\`-._     ,",' ;
  \"\         / /|   o   \._ `-._; /  ./-.
   ; ';,     / / |    `__ \ `-.,( /  //.-'
  :\  \\;_.-" ;  |.-"`    ``\    /-. /.-'
   :\  .\),.-'  /      }{    |   '..'
     \ .-\      |          , /
      '..'      ;'        , /
               ( __ `;--;'__`)
                `//'`    `||`
               _//        ||
       .-"-._,(__)      .(__).-""-.
      /          \     /           \
      \          /     \           /
       `'--=="--`       `--""==--'` 
       
Fear of the ratman, fear of the ratman
I have constant fear that ratman
always near
Fear of the ratman, fear of the ratman
I have a phobia that ratman is
always there

Have you run your fingers down
the wall
And have you felt your neck skin crawl
When you're searching for the light?
Sometimes when you're scared
to take a look
At the corner of the room
You've sensed that ratman is
watching you

Have you ever been alone at night
Thought you heard footsteps behind
And turned around and no one's there?
And as you quicken up your pace
You find it hard to look again
Because you're sure there's
ratman there

Watching Efuzan's blinking ball the night before
Debating witches and folklores
The unknown troubles on your mind
Maybe your mind is playing tricks
You sense, and suddenly eyes fix
On dancing shadows from behind

Fear of the ratman, fear of the ratman
I have constant fear that ratman is
always near
Fear of the ratman, fear of the ratman
I have a phobia that ratman is
always there

When I'm walking a dark road
I am a magi who walks alone

 

note to savant Warmaster immortal
note subject Face your phobias!
note edit

Walk into the heart of danger

Into the heart of danger
Tear down the walls and crash the gates
Don't run away from yourself
You're on a brave new journey now

Clench your fist and put a grin on your face
Just let go and you'll never be the same

Walk into the heart of danger
And don't let the darkness enchain you
Walk into the heart of danger
Face your phobia

You are the roar of a lion
You are the raging storm
Passion and pain, lost love
Finding the will for victory

One with the heroes who dwell in your soul
You get stronger every time you fall

YOU
GET
STRONGER
EVERY
TIME
YOU
FALL

Walk into the heart of danger
And don't let the darkness enchain you
Walk into the heart of danger
Face your phobia

It's not okay for others to decide,
Who you should be and how to live your life

Walk into the heart of danger
And don't let the darkness enchain you
Walk into the heart of danger
Face your phobia

Walk into the heart of danger
And don't let the darkness enchain you
Walk into the heart of danger
Face your phobia, oh
Face your phobia, oh
Face your phobia, oh
Face your phobia.

FACE
ME

 

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