The Lemming Posted July 15, 2006 Report Share Posted July 15, 2006 Agent: Here at the evil reintegration program we take people who have made some poor choices in their life and try to find something you will be constructive and good at. So let me ask you, What is it that would make you happy. Xsi: Well I have, umm, in the past I…How about something in the medical field? Agent: Hmm… let me see. Ahhh, there is an opening at an alternative medicine clinic. Pay is commission based, so you get payed on the number of patients you you treat in a day. How does that sound? Xsi: I guess I will give it a try… THE NEXT DAY A patient walks into the room to find Xsi dressed up in a doctors coat and sits down on the table. Patient: Doc, I have a headache can you help me? Xsi: (While his back is turned putting on some rubber gloves) Have you taken anything for it? Patient: A bit of advil, but that is it. Xsi: Any particular reason you have this headache? Patient: No I walked out of that pizza place next door, and I had a headache. Xsi: (now turning around) Any bleeding or swelling? Patient: No I think it is just a headache. Xsi: I think I can help you, drink this tea. Patient: What is it? What does it do? Xsi: something I picked up at the supermarket, hopefully it will relax you. Patient: It smells funny can I trust it? Xsi: For god’s sake it is Earl Grey tea… The patient drinks it and likes it then Xsi’s hands begin to glow… Xsi: I can infact help you but I have to warn you there may be some side effects. Patient: How bad? I mean it is just a headache. Xsi: (he chuckles a bit) Well they wont kill you. Patient: Ok sounds good, but why are your hands glowing. Xsi: Just have a little faith and relax. Xsi’s hands glow bright and he holds them over the patients head. Xsi: How does that feel? Patient: Better, much better, WOW, thanks Doc! Xsi: Here give this to the receptionist to settle the bill. Xsi hands a piece of paper to the patient who exits the room and goes to the receptionists desk. As the patient finishes paying Xsi walks by. Xsi: Have a nice day. Patient: You too Doc, I will be back next time I…(at that the patient screams in agony as boils and sores erupt from his skin.) Xsi looks over his shoulder just in time to see the man crouched on the floor and soil himself in the hall. Xsi: Yep I think I am going to like this job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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